Saturday, January 30, 2010

Week 3: Take Time for Training

I've been light on blogging this week. Seems everyone doing the program with Vicki on momTV is blogging light, too. This week is mostly about observation. Luck for me since my sister and her family was here. As an added bonus all five kids got sick, one right after the other. And then my sister got sick. Blah, no fun!

Go here to read Vicki's introduction to the week.

These are quotes that Vicki said on the show and posted on her blog. They all make so much sense to me.

“If they can walk, they can work.” Vicki

“Never do for a child, what he can do for himself.”Dreikurs

“Work is worth.” – Roosevelt

Here are the questions that I need to ask myself and then sit back and observe:
  • What can your children do, that they will do? (Remember, no interfering from you)
  • What can your children do, that they don’t do?
  • What can’t your children do because they haven’t been trained?
Tough questions. Here's what I have learned this week. My kids can do a lot of things and when left to their own devises they will, especially if they want it now! However, I have created monsters who need to be reminded about almost everything. It's hard to say what they can do and will do, because I step in and remind far to often. So now they don't have to remember anything, so they don't even bother trying. Okay, maybe this is a bit of a generalization, but it's mostly true. There are also lots of things they haven't been trained to do and some how I expect that they should know how to do them.

I have a few mantras. A couple of years ago I ran across the quote:


I made up a bunch of small signs and have them hanging all over my house. It is a reminder to me, when I am about to loos it.

This year my new mantra is:

It has occurred to me that when my children ask for help it's because they want to engage me. So if I say, "Let me teach you" or put my hands over theirs and guide them, I am interacting with them and teaching them at the same time. Sweet Girl has even begun to ask me to teach her things. And that just seems right somehow. If I can raise children who ask when they want to learn something or don't know how to do something then I am raising adults who do the same and the sky is the limit!

1 comment:

becca said...

i am standing up clapping!!! see you do have a training stradagy. do you do this with sweetyheart too when she whines in the morning? she is not too old to learn. she will get it. the older they are the longer it takes to train.